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Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Seriously?

Walking in the mall, minding my own business when out of the blue, I ran into someone I knew.  This someone asked me what happened to me. I looked down at myself and tried to figure it out too. Was it that obvious? I had gained some weight since college (but who hadn't). After all, I gave birth THREE times!  My hair has started turning gray, but I managed to hide it under the hair that is still brown.  I didn't know what they meant by "What happened to you?", so I started rambling off excuses.  One after the other, the excuses spewed out. I started with the fact that I have three children that are very active in sports and activities and my car is a local taxi and I am tired (which is why the bags under my eyes have become the size of Hefty trash bags).  Then I explained how my career had taken a turn and things have picked up over the past couple of years and I was taking work home with me (which is why I carry around two phones, a tablet and a laptop). As I made excuses for what I thought were my shortcomings, they listened intently.
After a few minutes, I asked.."What do you mean what happened to me?" I thought I had it all figured out or at least I thought I appeared to have it pulled together, but maybe it was all in my head.
The person looked at me, smiled awkwardly and uttered.."In high school, you were going to be a journalist or a writer.  I thought by now you would have made something of yourself, but you are just like the rest of us and you look burnt out!"  I changed the subject and over the past couple of days, I have been thinking about their comment and I was beating myself up over it.  I had made something of myself and I am very happy with the woman I have become.  
I am a mother.  I have been granted the opportunity to teach three children what the world has taught me (even if sometimes I feel like life is punking me).  This is by far the biggest and best career I could have been given.  These three are insanely cute and are like sponges and I get to be the person that teaches them to learn how to forgive and be forgiving.  To use your God given talents to make a perfect universe for yourself and even though you might not think so, your mother is always right!
I am a writer (and a constant reader).  I have taken the words from writers like Aesop, Jane Austen, Amiri Baraka, William Shakespeare, Paul Laurence Dunbar and Sonia Sanchez and applied them to my daily living.  Not everyone has the oppprtunity to give a friend hope with the words of greats like Dr. Cornel West.
I am a friend.  Very simple. I ALWAYS consider what someone else might be going through before I run into them and try to delete their confidence with my words.  I would never tell someone that I thought they were going to be someone, but they aren't.  We are all relevant!  I KNOW I am.
I wish I had thought of all these things when that person approached me, but I was thrown off, but next time, I will be armed with a quick mind and a slick tongue.

I have tried to be a man of letters in love with ideas in order to be a wiser and more loving person, hoping to leave the world just a little better than I found it.” ~Cornel West




1 comment:

  1. People are funny. Everybody seems to want to put other people in a box. And as long as you fit in THEIR box as to where they think you should be, then everything is ok.

    You've done what's best for you and your kids. No explanation or apology needed.

    And who hasn't gained a pound or 2 since college? We all have. But we still look good.

    Eff em. LoL

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