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Sunday, December 18, 2011

She wore an itsy bitsy teenie weenie...

I am a believer in the simplest of things, therefore, I keep my motto's simple.  One of my most simplest of motto's is.. "If you can get dressed for parties, school, and outings.  You can get dressed appropriately for church." Simple, right? Well maybe not so simple for my teenager.  Let me start at the beginning...

My father is a minister and I grew up in the church.  We were involved in so many choirs and activities, we weren't free to do anything else (Well, that's not entirely true, but I promise to tell you about that sometime).  Needless to say, as children in my parents house we had to be up, clean, dressed and ready for church EVERY Sunday morning.  There was no being late.  If we thought we were going to sleep in, we were mistaken.  We couldn't fake sick. We had BETTER be ready to get in the car when my dad said "Let's go!"  You have to understand, I am a little more lenient with my children.  We don't attend church every Sunday.  Some Sunday's I stay in bed and watch Lifetime and wear pajamas all day! Some Sunday's I would rather have brunch with my girlfriends and I watch church on TV.  DON'T JUDGE ME!   But this Sunday was different.  We woke up at 8:30AM.  Church service starts at 11 AM.  Plenty of time I thought, so I yelled to the kids to get ready for church. Simple, right?
Maybe not.
My teenager remains in her bed.  I walked by her room several times.  As I looked in on her all within 30 minutes.  She was on Twitter, Facebook, texting, watching old Jefferson reruns, but she didn't budge from her bed.  I commence to helping my youngest get dressed, assisting my preteen iron his pants, making oatmeal for the troop and getting myself together.  I look in her room, no movement.  I call out..."We are leaving in 15 minutes!"  I poke my ear out and I hear her stirring.  Then she prepares herself slowly.  I forgot to add...When I was a child, we were NOT allowed to wear pants to church and our skirts (or dresses) better be fingertips down our leg to ensure boys were not taking a peek up our dresses as we praised God.  But I am more lenient.  I allow her to wear pants, but they must be appropriate, it's called the church dress code.  After about 10 minutes she yells out, "I'm coming!"
We wait.
We wait!
We wait?
I immediately grab my keys and yell back out.."Let's go NOW!"  As she emerges, I can't believe my eyes.  She is wearing the tightest, smallest, most hoochiest (if that's even a word) little black skirt that they make in the store.  Where did she even get this little thing from?The skirt is coupled with black flowery tights, combat boots, a blazer, a scarf , large pink earrings and a VERY large bow on her head.  I stood. FROZEN.
I glance at the clock and its 11AM and church has begun without us.  I decide that today is not the day for a fight, but a lesson.  After all there are countless teenage girls that will be in church dress code and they will sure point and stare and my teenager will notice them noticing her.
As we are nearing the church door entrance I remind her of my motto.  "If you can get dressed for parties, school, and outings.  You can get dressed appropriately for church."
As we stand up for the responsive readings, prayer, alter call and just some ordinary praise and worship, I notice all the girls looking at her and pointing.  Then I glance at my daughter and she has her crossbody bag across her, but resting on her back so no one can see her hindparts.  TOO LATE!  I wanted to yell out, but I gave a little I told you so smirk and kept right on clapping.  For the rest of the service, she placed her coat over her legs and looked very uncomfortable.

I couldn't believe she decided to wear that toddler skirt to church, but after the looks she received today, she's sure to be dressed appropriately next time. I can only hope!


  1. lol loved t5his story!! sometimes silently teaching a lesson is better than an all out fight!!

  2. She really wasn't wearing this outfit. I added for effect!